“We’re Not Good at Taking Pictures!”
I hear this all the time: “We’re so awkward in photos!” or “My kids never cooperate!” or “I never know what to do with my hands!”
Here’s the secret: The best family photos don’t feel like posing at all.
My job isn’t to make you into professional models – it’s to help you interact naturally while I capture those moments. Let me share some simple techniques that make everyone look great without feeling stiff or unnatural.
The Philosophy: Prompts Over Poses
Instead of “Stand here, put your hand here, smile,” I prefer giving you prompts – little activities or interactions that create natural moments.
Traditional Pose: “Everyone look at the camera and say cheese!”
Natural Prompt: “Parents, whisper something silly in your kids’ ears!”
See the difference? One creates forced smiles. The other creates genuine laughter and connection.
Easy Posing Tips for the Whole Family
1. **Get Close – Closer Than Feels Normal
Personal space is great in real life, but in photos, you want to be touching.
Why it works: Creates connection and intimacy. Eliminates awkward gaps between people.
How to do it:
- Shoulders touching
- Arms around each other
- Sitting on laps or leaning in
- Foreheads touching
Pro tip: If you can fit a hand between two people, you’re not close enough!
2. **Create Triangles with Your Heads
When everyone’s head is in a straight line, photos look stiff. Vary the heights!
How to do it:
- Some people sitting, some standing
- Parents kneeling with kids standing
- Taller people slightly behind shorter people
- Kids on parents’ shoulders or in arms
Why it works: Creates visual interest and feels more dynamic.
3. **Do Something with Your Hands
“What do I do with my hands?” is the eternal question!
Natural hand placement:
- Hold your kids or spouse
- Hands in pockets (thumb out looks best)
- Play with kids’ hair
- Hold hands with each other
- Touch your spouse’s arm or shoulder
- Hands around your spouse’s waist
Avoid:
- Stiff arms straight down
- Hands clasped in front (looks formal)
- Crossing arms (looks defensive)
- Holding hands directly in front of your body
4. **Look at Each Other, Not Just the Camera
Some of the best photos happen when you’re NOT looking at the camera.
Try these:
- Parents looking at their kids
- Kids looking at each other
- Family members laughing together
- Looking off to the side at something interesting
The ratio: Aim for about 70% candid/interaction shots and 30% “everyone look at camera” shots.
Posing Tips for Couples (Parents)
5. **The Basic Romantic Stance
Position:
- Stand at a slight angle to each other (not straight on)
- One person’s arm around the other’s waist
- Bodies touching (hips, shoulders)
- Lean in slightly toward each other
Variations:
- Behind hug (one partner behind, arms around the other)
- Forehead touch
- Hand on cheek while looking at each other
- Walking together, hand-in-hand
6. **Create Different Levels
Examples:
- One person sitting on a bench/step, other standing
- One person on tiptoes for a kiss
- Piggyback or shoulder rides (fun and playful!)
Posing Tips for Kids
7. **Let Them Move
The fastest way to get grumpy kids? Make them stand still for 20 minutes.
Instead:
- Walking toward the camera
- Running and jumping
- Playing a game (ring around the rosie, follow the leader)
- Exploring the location
Pro tip: I’ll catch great candid moments while they’re moving naturally.
8. **Give Them a Job
Kids cooperate better when they have a task:
Ideas:
- “Show me how high you can jump!”
- “Can you run to that tree and back?”
- “Whisper a secret to your brother”
- “Give mom the biggest squeeze hug!”
- “Show me your silly face… now your serious face!”
9. **Siblings: Create Connection
Getting siblings to look natural together can be tricky.
Prompts that work:
- Holding hands or linking arms
- Older sibling reading to younger
- Playing a hand-clap game
- Telling each other jokes
- Group hug sandwich
For siblings who fight: “Okay, everyone pretend to be best friends for just 10 minutes!” (Said with humor, it usually gets a laugh!)
Posing Tips for Different Family Compositions
Family with Babies (under 1 year)
What works:
- Parents sitting on ground with baby
- Baby on blanket with family around
- Close-up shots of baby’s hands in parents’ hands
- Over-the-shoulder shots of baby
- Everyone lying down on their tummies
Pro tip: Schedule during baby’s happiest time of day (usually after a nap and feeding).
Family with Toddlers (1-3 years)
What works:
- Keep it SHORT (max 20-30 minutes)
- Lots of movement and play
- Parents playing with them naturally
- Blowing bubbles or bringing favorite toy
- Snack breaks as needed
Pro tip: Toddlers don’t “pose” – we capture moments!
Family with School-Age Kids (4-12 years)
What works:
- They can follow some direction
- Fun prompts (“Make your silliest face!”)
- Give them confidence (“You look so great!”)
- Let them suggest ideas
- Bribery absolutely works at this age 😊
Family with Teenagers
What works:
- Keep it casual and low-pressure
- Let them have input on location/outfits
- Individual shots first (they’ll feel more confident)
- Don’t say “SMILE” repeatedly (eye rolls guaranteed)
- Acknowledge it might feel awkward – humor helps
Pro tip: “Give me 15 minutes and we’re done” works better than open-ended sessions.
Extended Family / Large Groups
Organization tips:
- Have a grouping list ready
- Start with largest group first (everyone fresh)
- Then break into smaller family units
- End with smallest groups (kids are done, adults remain)
Posing large groups:
- Use different levels (standing, sitting, kneeling)
- Create a triangle or pyramid shape
- Grandparents in center, families around them
- Keep it relatively tight (no big gaps)
Camera-Facing Poses That Don’t Look Stiff
Sometimes you DO want everyone looking at the camera. Here’s how to make it look natural:
10. **The “Casual Look Back”
- Start walking away from camera
- On my count, everyone looks back over their shoulder
- Creates relaxed, candid feel
11. **The “Laughing at Camera”
Instead of “say cheese”:
- “Everyone say something silly!”
- “On three, everyone make your weirdest face!”
- Then we get a genuine laugh when I count or make a silly sound
12. **The “Almost Looking”
- Most people looking at camera
- One or two people (usually kids) looking at parents or each other
- Creates authentic, relaxed feel
Body Positioning That Flatters Everyone
For Adults:
Generally flattering:
- Angle your body slightly (not straight-on to camera)
- Shift weight to back leg, bend front knee slightly
- For women: hand on hip creates a nice shape
- Keep spine straight, shoulders back
- Chin slightly forward and down (eliminates double chin)
What to avoid:
- Straight-on to camera (especially for full-body shots)
- Hands directly at sides
- Slouching or hunching
- Tilting head back (creates unflattering angle)
For Kids:
Honestly? Kids usually look adorable no matter what!
The key is capturing their personality:
- Shy kid? Quiet, gentle prompts work best
- Energetic kid? Let them jump and run!
- Silly kid? Encourage their goofiness!
The Secret: Forget You’re Being Photographed
The very best photos happen when you stop thinking about the camera and focus on each other.
Ways to do this:
- Talk to each other
- Tell inside jokes
- Recall funny memories
- Parents: focus on your kids
- Kids: make each other laugh
My job is to capture those in-between moments when you forget I’m there.
What If We’re Really Awkward?
You’re not alone! Most families feel uncomfortable at first. Here’s what helps:
We’ll start slow:
- Easy poses first
- Build confidence gradually
- Warm up with simple prompts
We’ll keep it fun:
- I’ll make jokes (probably dad jokes, sorry)
- Silly songs for kids
- No pressure for perfection
We’ll keep it short:
- Quality over quantity
- 30-45 minutes is usually plenty
- We’ll take breaks if needed
Remember: Perfectly Imperfect
The photo where your toddler is mid-wiggle? That’s the one you’ll treasure.
The shot where everyone’s laughing because dad told a terrible joke? That’s the real one.
The moment when your kids are being goofy instead of “perfect”? That’s YOUR family.
Don’t stress about perfect poses. Trust the process, be yourselves, and let me worry about making it all look beautiful.
Let’s Create Something Authentic
Now that you know posing doesn’t have to be scary or stiff, are you ready to create some natural, beautiful photos of your family?
Contact me to book your session – awkwardness welcome! 😊
Why I Chase the In-Between Moments
I spend a good part of every session simply letting things happen — talking, walking, goofing around — watching and shooting while a family forgets I am there. That is when the real stuff comes out.
Posed shots absolutely have their place, and every family needs one clean group photo. But the magic lives in the in-between, and that is what I am always chasing.